English people do rock so very hard sometimes.

On the queen’s jubilee weekend, I would have liked to have seen a bit more anti-monarchist dissent. This wasn’t quite the outburst of republican outrage that I was hoping for.

But I guess after several decades of seeing the punk protests come to little, and national opinion still overwhelmingly approve of funding inherited puppets, it’s fair that kids these days might just figure the best they can do is throw a big, filthy party and have their own kind of fun.

The lack of police was pretty miraculous – obviously they had bigger fish to fry elsewhere, national security and all that. Don’t expect I’ll see so many people hoofing balloons, smoking weed and snorting lines next to Broadway Market any time soon. Hats off.

Best part: The guy swimming through the lock, obvs.

My favourite boat: The one with the extra little yellow pool full of rubber duckies.