If you’re not my friend on Facebook (and you only are if you have met me in person), then you won’t have seen my list of favourite quotes. Which is a shame – it’s not a bad list. I’ve gardened it carefully. And it’s not the standard ones you get from the Dalai Lama, Noam Chomsky and inspirational calendars. I’ve got some good ones in there from some smart people you haven’t heard of (such as “Biology is art,” my first year bio prof at university, Dr Spencer Barrett) and some you have (“Never pick a fight with a man who buys ink by the barrel,” Mark Twain).

Some of the most interesting ones come from my nutty family and my almost-as-nutty friends. For those of you unfortunate enough not to be my friend, here I re-post for your delectation.

“You fucking brat. You must have been an ugly, blind nun in your previous life.” Kelley Harron, my aunt, when I landed an awesome new gig

“Monogamy is my favourite form of sexual perversion.” Daniel Farrel, my friend

“You can’t give up drinking, Zoe, you’re a journalist – you’d be letting down your entire profession.” Peter Farrel, Daniel’s brother and also my friend

“If you don’t talk back to your parents they’ll never learn anything.” Martha Harron, my mother

“Reproduction is overrated.” Jordan Heath-Rawlings, my first love

“I’m sorry, but I just can’t fall in love with somebody who can’t write.” Marianne Vizinczey, my aunt

“All men are cowards.” Rory O’Brien, my friend

“Many of the best things I did in my life came from the spirit of “‘I’ll show you.'” Mary Harron, my aunt

“If you can make a modest living at something you love to do, you are one of the luckiest people in the world.” Don Harron, actor, writer, comedian, and my grandpa

“If smart women never slept with stupid assholes, half the planet wouldn’t be here.” Me, Zoe Cormier (Take that for good or bad, you pick.)

“From my own life what I most regret is the time I wasted giving in to despair. You are not entitled to despair.” Stephen Vizenczey, my step-grandfather

“One should never be afraid of being ridiculous – it is the only way to be free.” Stephen Vizinczey